Why Awkward Males Are Awesome

Thought Catalog

For the longest time, the only sort of men who could get my attention were alpha males. They’re of a certain kind – strong, confident, opionated, and leaders. They come across as cocky if you don’t really know them, and sometimes, even if you do, but they’re good guys to have around. They know what to do, and how to get it done.

I’ve tried dating a few different guys – but if they couldn’t hold their alcohol, they weren’t alpha enough. Next. If they weren’t the centre of attention, they weren’t alpha enough. Next. If they weren’t the smartest, or the strongest, or the bravest, or just the best at whatever they chose to do, they weren’t worth my time. I made a checklist and looked around me and found that I simply couldn’t find someone who met my standards.

Were my standards impossibly…

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Sunday thoughts lingering.

I read a quote last night and it said:

“We met at the wrong time. That’s what I keep telling myself anyway. Maybe one day years from now, we’ll meet in a coffee shop in a far away city somewhere and give it another shot.”

Considering that this was posted by someone..how should I say this?? someone whom I just recently let go of. (I’m happy by the way because we’re trying to be friends again.) But it’s just so Ironic that I’m not the one who’s posting those sad quotes on the net anymore. Although I don’t know whom he addresses the quotes too. :))

but 2 years ago, I was a sucker for them. I basked myself in endless love forsaken quotes. and the funny thing about it is because last night, I bumped into the muse of my ecstasy-desolated quotes in a coffeeshop after 2-3 years. Hahahaha!

— I was in a coffee shop as I said.. Just minding my own business. my mind swimming along the sea of words and letters now made incomprehensible by book that ached for my avid attention. So there I was, studying and alone at the table when suddenly this not-so-stranger sat at my table. Now, 2 or 3 years ago, I would have shat my pants becaus of the excitement brought about by this soul. But now, as he looked at me straight in the eye, and talked to me like nothing happened, I could not feel the butterflies in my stomach. I think they all died in those 2 years with just books and school as nourishment. hahaha!

Well certainly, the tug of familiarity was still there. Don’t get me wrong. But I really just couldn’t feel anything besides gladness seeing him again. that’s it. no hearts all over the place, no gloria playing in the background. He didn’t even glow.(Objects of my fixations would normally look like this through my eyes. Omg, you might think I’m a total weirdo! too late. you’re already reading this post.) Anywho..I felt nothing. nada..kaput. non. None. Zero.

It’s sunday today, and I’d want to share this to you because I realized that God has his ways of mending something broken. In His time, In His pace, In our confidence. Always remember that God won’t ever leave us forsaken. Even if you think that heartbreak could truly manifest a myocardial infarction because of the stress, Pray. God has His ways. Well,ofcourse you should stop stalking your muse too. give yourself time and space. It’s not a one way process.

God Bless fellow teenagers! Have a blessed sunday and don’t forget to pray! 😀

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.In all your ways acknowledge him,and he will make straight your paths

Proverbs 3:5-6

Lessons

J, –You were my first crush. and it’s kind of pathetic because I had a crush on you since kindergarten, but then you taught me to be hopeful.

P,–You taught me of perseverance. you taught me not to give up. even if it meant looking through my window every now and then. #MajorCreep I know. Hahahaha!

M,–You taught me confidentiality. You taught me how to be a confidant through what you share to me, be it with your crush, or your family problems.

G,–You taught me trust.how it could easily be shattered with just a single act,and how hard it is to put it back. 

B,– you taught me that things dont always go where you want them to and that you’ll just have to deal with that with prayer and committment.

R,–You taught me how to connect with people. Through music, thoughts and perspectives. You also taught me to be passionate with what I do.

C,– You taught me to be brave. You pushed me past my comfort zone.(of being timid and submissive and quiet with what’s really going on with my mind) You taught me how to speak.to be Ruthless in speaking my mind.

 

These are the things so far that i’ve acquired along with each heartbreak. And as I am typing this, I thank God for giving me these lessons. So when the day comes that I meet the person He has prepared for me, I’ll be armed and ready.

 

Thankyou, dear Father. 🙂